Wal*Mart Trip Plagued with Situation Comedy

I was minding my own business, trying on some fatboy shorts in the Wal-Mart fitting room this afternoon, when the power went out. It was pitch black and I had no pants on. I couldn't find my pants, or anything else in the tiny chamber.

Outside the room, somewhere, was my elderly mother shouting for my three year old son who was lost in the darkness. The pressure to find my pants in the blackness and put them on mounted.

Fortunately, Aiden was wearing those little shoes with flashing lights on them and my mother was able to find him in the abyss. And I eventually found my pants, just before the 'associate' burst in with a flashlight to make sure I wasn't shoplifting.

The checkouts were still powered so I bought the pair of shorts I tried on. However, when my mother was exiting the store with us, we lost her and I couldn't get back in through the now-locked doors. Turns out she was getting frisked because she was carrying two toys Aiden got with his Happy Meal at McDonald's. My mother killed herself laughing for the next half hour.

Wal-Mart is really protective of their inventory when the lights go out.